quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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