Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm bleeding and have questions
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
