Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
