thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
