Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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