I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
