thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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