don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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