We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize