To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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