we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
