Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
