oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
