i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I have aggressive nipples.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
