Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
