I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
