I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
