I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
You smell like stripper and shame
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
