i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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