the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize