I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
