I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
