I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
