Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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