my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
