he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
