Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
