margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
