How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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