Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
