i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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