When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
