dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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