I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
No subtext here. People are naked.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
