you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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