All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
