oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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