if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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