people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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