I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
