Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
We just shotgunned beers for America
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
