You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
