yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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