My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
