He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Randomize
