don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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