I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
