it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
