theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
