Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
