I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize